Going back to school after Thanksgiving break is hard. Eitan claimed he was “sick”. To get him to go to school, I told him he could go to the nurse and come home if he felt worse during the day. Of course, I get a call at 1:30 with a little boy asking to come home, and the nurse telling me there’s no fever. So I sent Rich to pick him up. When he got home we had a little talk, and I explained that this could only happen when he’s coming back from a long break, since that is hard. He responded, “I probably won’t feel well when I come back from Chanukah break either.” Fair warning, mom!
I overheard this conversation between Eitan and his friend Z during a recent playdate.
Eitan: I have money.
Z: How?
Eitan: I have an allowance.
Z: What’s an allowance?
Eitan: It’s when you get money and you don’t have a job.
Z: Wait, but how did you get to do this?
Eitan: I asked my parents. You can ask your parents.
Z: My parents don’t let me have money.
Eitan: How about I give you 2 dollars?
I still can’t decide if I’m proud or embarrassed!
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Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder
Mama: Eitan, what do you think of my new lipstick?
Eitan: mmmm it’s pretty nice. You might look better in blue or red though
Eitan came home from school one day with a laminated piece of paper with the Hebrew alphabet on it. When I took it out of the bag, it was very sticky. I said, “ick! Why is this sticky?”
Eitan replied, “that’s probably the honey.”
“Why was there honey on it?”
“There was an activity. It didn’t go well.”
Pause for laughter.
It turns out it was to teach the children that learning Hebrew is sweet. I’m guessing the “it didn’t go well” was really a teacher’s review that Eitan overheard.
Eitan usually tells us nothing about school. We have to beg for crumbs of information. That’s why I was so surprised recently when he suddenly announced in the car on the way home, “Happy News!”
Mama: “What’s the news?”
Eitan: “Mrs. Rose played at recess today!”
Mama: “That’s great! What did she play with you?”
Eitan: “She was the guard.”
Mama: “Cool. What did she guard?”
Eitan: “The Diamonds.”
I can only assume this was Minecraft-inspired.
I’ve been reading to Eitan “Does God Have a Big Toe?” every night. We are loving the stories, and I’m loving the ensuing discussion.
Eitan: Where is the Garden of Eden?
Mama: No one knows
Eitan: I’m going to find it
Mama: I don’t think that’s possible; I think God hid it
Eitan: How? Is it protected?
Mama: I don’t know; I’ll get back to you
…. Mama learns the exact answer in Torah study that Shabbat …
Mama: I have an answer for you. God stationed an angel outside of the garden to protect it, with a fiery ever-turning sword. The angel is enormous, with the body of a lion and wings like an eagle.
Eitan: I can take him.
Eitan: “If God knows everything that will happen, why did he put Adam and Eve in the garden if he knew he would just kick them out?”
Sometimes, the question is more important than the answer.
Eitan: “What are you talking about?”
Mama: “We’re trying to decide on a domain name for Elijah’s bar mitzvah website”
Eitan: “What’s he going to sell?”
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Cost of Food
Mama: “I’ll get bagels for Shabbat, but we’ll have bread the rest of the week”
Eitan: “Only bread? What are we, poor?”
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Healthy Eating
Eitan: “I want ice cream.”
Mama: “Can you choose something healthy?”
Eitan: “Vanilla”