Eitan: are you ever gonna get divorced?
Rich: I’m not planning on it
E: what if somebody really… (takes bite of ice cream, it’s quiet for a long time while Rich and I wait to hear where this is going. Apparently we can’t wait).
Mama: what???
Dada: hot comes along?
Eitan: yeah like boiling to death!
Mama: I guess we’d have to reevaluate!
Eitan to imaginary hot person: want a popsicle?
Jewish Food
Eitan: is banana bread Jewish?
Reasonable question since we have it for Shabbat a lot!
Eitan was drawing in his notebook and showing me the (minecraft?) animal he designed. It had two enormous black dots on it.
Mama: “That’s great! What are those two black dots?”
Eitan: “Those are its belly buttons”
Mama, treading carefully: “Usually animals only have one belly button”
Eitan, lifting his shirt: “I have two!”
Mama: “Oh you mean your nipples!”
Eitan: “yes!”
Mama: “Ok, the thing down here (showing him) is your belly button.”
Eitan: “Ok I’ll add that too”

Lego Master
Dada was building an arctic biome and had collected a lot of white lego blocks. I commented on this when I couldn’t find any white blocks, “Oh, Dada, you have them all!”
Eitan looked over and said, “yeah, Dada, you’re the white master!”
Rich responded, completely deadpan, “Don’t call me that.”
Trip to Vegas
We were leaving Nana and Papa’s house at about 8:45PM. Eitan said, “I think we’re going to get home at 9:10. Mama you guess too!”
I responded, “I think 9:15.”
We got home at exactly 9:10! I told Eitan we should take him to Vegas, and he said, “Yeah, and I can guess the time it takes to get there too!”
Sympathetically. Eitan now does everything sympathetically. Last night, I asked him if he was in his pj’s yet, and I heard, “I’m drying my tush sympathetically!”
Good?
Mama: Eitani, your eye is red. Is it hurting you?
Eitan: No, I was rubbing it a lot
Mama: Ok, let me know if it hurts
Eitan: I rub this eye in winter, summer, and fall. I rub my other eye in the other season.
Mama: Spring?
Eitan: Yeah that one
Mama: Ok, that sounds like a good plan
Eitan: Want to see Bob? [in Minecraft]
Mama: Who’s Bob?
Eitan: My wife!
Note: Bob turned out to be a Pirate Villager
Eitan wants to get a computer so he can play Minecraft Java Edition on the TV. He knows our computers aren’t powerful enough for more than one player, however. He told Papa about this recently:
“We need to get a computer that’s strong, Papa.”
I love his use of the word strong to mean powerful. It’s not one an adult would ever use, but it means the same thing!
In response to a book where a character stopped picking up pennies because she was so rich, Eitan declared “I still pick up pennies. You know, because they’re out of stock.”
He’d been told pennies were no longer being made, but I love his consumerist spin on this fact!